Whom would you prefer to pat down at an airline security check-in?

Stig Fogh Anderson as Tristan or Irene Theorin as Isolde? 12:00-6:00 SVERIGES P2

Bryan Hymel as Jose or Rinat Shaham as Carmen? 1:00-6:00 CBC 2

Massimiliano Pisapia as Roberto Devereux or . . . . . . WHO? ? ? ! ! ! PISAPIN ! Massimiliano Pisapin ! ! ! ! !? 1:00-4:00 DEUTSCHLANDRADIO KULTUR

Diane Damrau as Marie or Juan Diego Florez as Tonio. (I’ll be on the verandah.)? 1:00-4:00 KBYU

Denyce Graves as Margaret Garner or Eric Greene as Robert? 1:00-5:00 NPR World of Opera

Adrienne Pieczonka as Elsa or Richard Paul Fink as Telramund ? 1:00-5:00 KUSF

Kristina Opolais as Rusalka or Klaus Florian Vogt as the Prince. (yeah, my prints will be all over THAT Prince.) ? 1:00-4:00 NRK KLASSISK

A bunch of men isolated in barracks. DIE SOLDATEN on an airline. Yeah, sure? 1:00-5:00 RADIO 4 NETHERLANDS

Anya Harteros as Alcina or Veronica Cangemi as Rinaldo ? 1:00-5:00 RADIO CLASICA DE ESPANA

A bunch of Welsh people singing RADAMISTO or Bryn Terfel singing Rodgers and Hammerstein ? 1:00-5:00 BBC 3

Simon Keenlyside as MACBETTO or Erica Sunnegardh as Lady M. ? 1:00-5:00 RTP ANTENA 2

Gundula Janowitz as FIDELIO or Leonard Bernstein in the pit ? 1:00-5:00 VPR

Amanda Roocroft as the Governess or Andrew Kennedy as Peter Quint? 1:00-4:00 WCLV

Theo Adam in ALFONSO ED ESTRELLA or Soile Isokoski in DIE VERSCHWORENEN? 1:00-6:00 WCNY

Katia Pellegrino as NORMA or Gregory Kunde as Pollione? 1:00-5:30 WETA

Vladimir Galouzine as Ghermann or Judith Forst as the old Countess? 1:00-5:00 WFMT Network

Philippe Jaroussky or Massimiliano Pisapin? No contest. 1:00-5:00 WOSU

Florin Cezar Ouatu as MONTEZUMA or Mireille Delunsch as Eupaforice. Where do they come up with those names? 1:30-5:00 DWOJKE POLSKIE

Benjamin Britten or Krysztof Penderecki? 2:00-3:30 CESKY ROZHLAS D-Dur

Jose Van Dam as DON QUICHOTTE or Silvia Tro Santafe as Dulcinee? 2:00-5:00 CESKY ROZHLAS VLTAVA

Kurt Streit as IDOMENEO or Angeles Blancas Giulin as Ilia? 2:00-5:00 RADIO STEPHANSDOM

Ivan Magri as GIANNI DI PARIGI or . . .. lemme take another look at that Pisapin dude. 2:30-6:00 RADIO TRE

Robert Expert as Orlando . . . or . . . hmmmm “Betsabee Haas”. There’s something about that name that just calls for real close inspection. 4:00-6:00 BARTOK RADIO