Headshot of La Cieca

Cher Public

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Not canard, more loon

“More telephone ring tones come from Bizet’s Carmen that any other opera. This is no coincidence: Carmen is simply packed with glorious well-known arias which turn it into an exuberant performance of the composer’s greatest hits.” [Express]

27 comments

  • lrhonn says:

    I fail to understand why there is such hysteria about cell phones ringing when in my opinion coughing is a WORSE distraction. I have had several occasions where coughing ruined an act of an opera. I had a coughing spell once and immediately exited so as not to interfere with the persons seated around me.

    As for the phone, a few little tinkles distress me less than coughing except when a person decides to answer the ring. This happened once and the woman was told to stop talking and she did. I have no problem with concert halls being so ‘fixed’ to not allow calls in or out.

    Lucas Rhonn

    • manou says:

      How do you stand on borborygmus?

      • Batty Masetto says:

        I can think of few things more difficult to stand on than borborygmus. But it might be a gas to try.

      • m. croche says:

        The second piece of Nicolas Slonimsky’s 51 Minitudes for Piano -- whimsical little things -- is called “Borborygmus”. No youtube video, though, and I’m not prepared to make a recording of me sitting at the piano, following the performing direction Flatulento ma non troppo. In its place, I offer another item from the Russian-America annalist, conductor, composer, and general maker-of-mischief:

  • operaassport says:

    First, coughing is natural and sometimes can’t be helped.
    A ringing cellphone is inexcusable and should be penalized severely when it occurs in theaters.

    I know someone who has a Queen of the Night Act 2 aria ringtone. It sounds like Alvin and the Chipmunks. It’s the most excruciating sound I’ve ever heard and I’ve heard Chris Merritt sing.

  • I am going to ignore the stupidity of that canard cause, well, how do you respond to that? Let’s talk Opera ringtones:

    I tend to think that trumpet music makes the best for ringtones, but that is just my preference. Right now I have a section of one of Teleman’s trumpet Concertos and I get comments constantly.

    My ringtones tent to be either text or character driven, for the people who get assigned one:

    My mom and dad: Opening bars of Wynton Marsalis and Edita Gruberoba’s recording of Eternal source

    All my brother and sisters in law get a section of the Ride of the Walkyres (starts at 4:33)

    My brother gets Loge’s leitmotiv, because he is a firefighter

    My trucker cousin gets the opening bars from the overture to Fliegende Hollander you can guess why.

    My best friend gets the closing bars from the original Alfano ending to Turandot. That is her favorite. (starts at 9:18)

    Another close, very close friend of mine gets either the closing of The pearl Fisher’s duet (starts at 4:51) or Vivi tirano (starts at 3:46) he is the most magnanimous man I’ve known and he has been with me through thick and thin. Lately, I have been giving him the Forrest Bird’s leitmotiv (though he hates Wagner) because he never leads me astray with his counsel.

    My father in law gets a section of I am the Wife of Mao from Nixon in China (starts at 3:19) You listen to the section and make your own conclusions. Remember, they are either character or text driven). And that is all I am going to say about that.

    My honey gets the final phrases sung by Salome (Ich habe deine mund gekust) as sung by Inge Borkh if nothing else because it is triumphant, sexy and I love it. He used to get a section from Di tale amor from Trovatore, but then I discovered that section from salome and i was done.

    Whenever I get a text, I hear Pappageno’s tone

    Whenever I get a voice-mail, I hear Martina Arroyo making fun of Joan Sutherland’s trill on the Singer’s round table (Helo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o)

    My coworkers get a section from Beethoven’s 9th.

    My roommate gets Super Mario Bros tone.

    My hairdresser gets, what else? a section from Largo al Factotum

    My Boss gets the opening bars of Dove Fuggo from La vera Constanza because, well, who the fuck wants to get a call from the boss?

    Other Ringtones I have used: A section of Der Holle Rach with Deutekom and Popp. The Orfeo Fanfarre, which I love. I think it makes for an amazing basic ringtone. Siegfriend’s Horne call, Brahms Hungarian dance, I have even used Lady Gaga’s telephone (but who hasn’t)

    So I guess Wagner makes for the best ringtones, but then, it is all so personal. But funny, the only person that would get a Carmen ringtone is a friend of mine who sings Escamillo a lot.

    • m. croche says:

      So complicated! My husband gets Tea for Two and everyone else gets the Dog Trot.

    • LittleMasterMiles says:

      The fanfare from L’Orfeo is my basic ringtone too! Everyone gets that except my fiance, who gets a bit of our song (which I’m not going to name because of sentimentality), my brother who gets Akhnaten because he’s sung it (chorus), and my best friend used to get “Boogie Shoes.” Now I have a new best friend, and he only texts.

      • laddie says:

        I adore the fanfare from L’Orfeo. Now I will put it to good use.

        • LittleMasterMiles says:

          I’ve also used the opening fanfare from The Rake’s Progress, which I maintain was inspired by the Monteverdi (someone must know whether this is documented as true; I haven’t checked).

    • Avantialouie says:

      You have inspired me to prepare a vast series of ringtones for a variety of special calls. Inquiries about late deliveries will now get “Dove sono.” Any call to a florist will begin with “Poveri fiori.” Prospective invitees to a pot luck dinner will be greeted by “I wouldn’t tech them peas o’ hern.” Any inquiry to the IRS will start with “Papers, papers,” but I really SHOULD most likely be using “Va! Laisse couler mes larmes.” Disruptive neighbors at late hours will receive “O Sleep, why dost thou leave me?” Invitations to a sit-down dinner should originate with “Deh, vieni non tardar.” Any call to a child away at college should offer “Leb’wohl, du kuhnes, herrliches kind.” Any Republican will now get buzzed off at the very start with “And farewell to ye, Old Rights of Man.” The prelude to all calls to any Customer Service office ought to be “Der Holle Rache.” And calls about dinner reservations to restaurants with no vacancies should receive “Adieu, notre petite table.”

      • LOL! that is funny. Actually, I had a phone several years ago that had a ringtone setting for calls from numbers not on my contacts. I used to have Purquoi me revelliez assigned to those. Unfortunately, I have not had any phone after that one who had a similar setting

    • Mine is the Rondo from Mozart’s Clarinet Concerto

    • mountmccabe says:

      This is amazing! Your ringtone collection is even more extensive than mine! I love it!

      It was/is my goal to have a different ringtone for each contact in my phone but I have been slacking off for a while. I mostly went with songs that made me think of the caller (because they loved those songs) so I have only used a few operatic/classical ring tones. My father has a section of the overture to Der Fliegende Hollander as when I started this I had recently hooked him on Wagner.

    • alejandro says:

      I keep my phone on vibrate 98% of the time. When I need to use the ringtone it’s either the Rainbow Music from Das Rheingold or Alejandro by Lady Gaga. And that sums up my personality right there!

  • Quanto Painy Fakor says:

    I made one of Rysanek shrieks and another of her “A te la mala pasqua!,” but it frightens people.

    • rysanekfreak says:

      It wouldn’t frighten me. Not in the least.

      • Quanto Painy Fakor says:

        Exceptional clear dub now online:

        • Quanto Painy Fakor says:

          also excellent quality of long-known blizzard performance with all of Rysanek’s overtones in full bloom. She enters a measure early for “Mit [seinem Stab]” but catches herself quickly and saves it well.


          Lesser known: Bayreuth 1966!

    • I actually have one made of the Nothung part (including the Shriek) from the Phillips Walkure. I have thought about using it, but I do not have anyone who is “needy” nor do I have one who I feel is a hero of Sigmund’s proportions (mty brother the firefighter does not count, he is a god)

  • Quanto Painy Fakor says:

  • laddie says:

    I like hearing Vivaldi myself:
    Julia Lezhneva -- Antonio Vivaldi, Zeffiretti, che sussurrate