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I could go on gavotting

It’s taken more than a month for La Cieca to return to the Regie to the Rescue competition thanks in part to the generous wordage of the cher public. But, as the above Garlandesque image implies, it’s Rysanekfreak who takes the prize for a pop-cultural extravaganza overlaid on modest little Mignon.  Our next Regie Rescue follows the jump.  

In honor of tonight’s season-opening extravaganza, and in what perhaps may be interpreted as something less than “in honor” of Bartlett Sher’s contribution to the festivities, La Cieca now asks you, the cher public, to devise a Regie scenario for L’elisir d’amore, the more detail the better, with the goal of making the opera as lively and entertaining as the text and music will allow. The best attempt at fulfilling this tall order (as judged by La Cieca’s blue ribbon panel of experts) will win a coveted Gift Card.

All entries must be date-stamped prior to midnight on Wednesday, October 3, and the decision of your doyenne’s panel is, as always, utterly final.


  • sm says:

    Here are my program notes for Elisir
    Dulcamara: Representative of a well-known multinational cosmetic company.
    Adina: Local girl with a nasty skin condition.
    Belcore: Bisexual S and M leather guy.
    Nemorino: Recovering alcoholic.
    Gianetta: local lesbian librarian.
    Setting -- suburbs of Bristol at the present time.
    Act one
    Nemorino, a recovering alcoholic relates his love for Adina, a local girl with a nasty skin condition. Frustrated by her lack of success with the boys Adina has retreated into a world of romantic fiction which she reads aloud to her friends. Belcore arrives in full leather gear and military kit -- open to all new experiences; he relishes the challenge of chatting up the loveless Adina. The worried Nemorino tries to warn her off the fetishist, but she is already looking out gear, and says she wants to try a new sexual experience every day. Dulcamara and gives a slick demonstration of his products unfurling a life-size photo of Jane Fonda. The local girls encourage Adina to try some for her spots, but Nemorino asks for something to help his sex life. Dulcamara gives him several bottles to take and Nemorino plunges into his alcoholic ways to Adina’s fury, who says she is going to join up with the fetishist leather guy Belcore in six days. Nemorino thinks that once he has slept off the wine, Adina will come back to him. Belcore is texted by his mates that there is a big party in the adjoining city and so Adina must join up with him now or the whole thing is off. Nemorino is panicked and returns to his therapy group but asks Dulcamara for another bottle.
    Act 2
    Adina’s skin complaint is miraculously cured and preparations for the party are in full swing with leather queens and lesbians are arriving in full bondage attire for the celebrations. No sign of Nemorino, and Adina is beginning to feel uncomfortable in her leather gear. Nemorino appears, depressed, with a hangover from the day before, he asks Dulcamara for a bottle, but no money, no deal for the representative. Belcore finds Nemorino intriguing and attractive, and suddenly sees the possibility of having both Adina and the local boy. He praises the life of his military leather group and tries to get Nemorino to try on some gear. Nemorino still needs some cash and Belcore thinks that for a few pounds the boy will be his, and gets him to sign up for the group. Nemorino slinks off to buy a bottle from Dulcamara.
    Local lesbian Gianetta is discussing with the local lesbian group the fact that Nemorino has just inherited a fortune and could be a good surrogate. Nemorino appears and is amazed to find himself surrounded by courting lesbians and thinks Adina will be a pushover for his charms after his success with these girls. Adina sees him surrounded by the Sapphic wenches and thinks he may be bisexual after all. Meeting up with Dulcamara, he explains to her that Nemorino has been saving up for love potions and has sold his body to the leather group to buy more, all for some local girl. Adina realizes that the leather world is not for her and that Nemorino’s love is true.
    Nemorino enters and downs a bottle of wine and puts on a DVD of his favorite movie, weeping gently as he sings “una furtiva lagrima”. Adina come in carrying all her leather gadgets and Nemorino’s military gear, asking him to give it all up, but Nemorino is determined to join up with Belcore and his gang unless he finds a better offer. Adina finally admits her desire to settle down and have kids. Nemorino is thrilled, and supported by his alcoholics anonymous group falls in the arms of Adina. Belcore knows there are leather groups in other towns, and Dulcamara claims total success for his products -- samples of which he throws into the audience.
    The sponsor’s cosmetic Products are available at the in-house shop on leaving the theatre.